Suddenly, It All Makes Terrible Sense
Of course we've seen this before!
Our shocking-but-all-too-logical conclusion: McCain, inspired by Rex Harrison's iconic performance as Professor Henry Higgins, has a bet going with his cronies down at the VFW hall that he can take a simple, unsophisticated backwoods girl and, with only 60 days of intensive tutelage, pass her off to all and sundry as a bona fide world-leader-in-waiting.
So far, however, it's not fooling anyone outside of the usual yahoos from the "family values" crowd. "Professor" McCain, it would appear, has a lot more work to do.